It is so strange, and so wrong, to see our names beautifully printed together like this. Yes, it has been 6 months – but I still can’t believe it.

I am thankful for this:

For we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands. Meanwhile we groan, longing to be clothed instead with our heavenly dwelling, because when we are clothed, we will not be found naked. For while we are in this tent, we groan and are burdened, because we do not wish to be unclothed but to be clothed instead with our heavenly dwelling, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life. Now the one who has fashioned us for this very puropse is God, who has given us the Spirit as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.
Therefore we are always confident and know that as long as we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord. For we live by faith, not by sight. We are confident, I say, and would prefer to be away from the body and at home with the Lord. So we make it our goal to please him, whether we are at home in the body or away from it. For we must all appear before the judgement seat of Christ, so that each of us may receive what is due us for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad.
– 2 Corinthians 5:1-10

xx zs

Lord Jesus,

You have a power that I cannot comprehend. You have a love that I cannot comprehend. You have a perfect plan that I cannot comprehend. You raised Lazarus from the dead. You spared your people from the fire. You closed the lion’s mouths in the den.
Lord, why didn’t you spare Matthew? Why didn’t you intervene? Why didn’t you perform a miracle? Surely these things would have brought glory to your name? Surely the testimony of how you miraculously spared a young man’s life would have brought people to you?
Lord, I don’t presume to know better than you, but I am really struggling to understand why you allowed it to happen this way. Please give me peace and understanding. Please strengthen my faith and trust in you. Please be with all of us who continue to grieve.
Thank you for little things that make me smile, like this:

xx zs